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“I acknowledged my sin to you, and I did not cover my iniquity; I said, I will confess my transgressions to the Lord, and you forgave the iniquity of my sin. Selah.” Psalm 32:5 (ESV)

“Show me Lord if I’m the one who needs to change.”

Wonder if you’ve given voice to these words – I certainly have.  Faced with an outcome I just couldn’t come to terms with, I prayed fervently.  My mind couldn’t wrap itself around the facts of how this scenario played out. The replay did overtime consuming my thoughts. Unfair was spoken over and over in my mind.  And so as I daily cried out to God for some understanding and echoed my frustration, I heard nothing.  Yes, you got it – silence.

So it was in the pit of God’s quietness, I finally resolved, “Show me Lord if I’m the one who needs to change!”  Gently, He began to unveil my eyes.  Tenderly, He revealed a heart which needed to be softened.  Without a shout, God whispered to my spirit the exact thing standing in my way.  It wasn’t someone else – it was me. The enemy slaying my soul was unconfessed sin creeping in and taking up residence to my surprise.

While I admit the hardness of realizing something in me had to go, the freedom birthed after those moments of realization, confession and grace receiving were humbling and powerful.  The peace which evaded me for weeks was now my constant friend.  No longer did my thoughts replay events and grasp for questions and blame.  No longer did I allow an outcome to rule my reactions, mood or rob me of joy.  And the best part – the barrier between me and God was erased.

Sweet friends, we often forget the divide sin greats.  Unfortunately, we allow Satan to convince us that no one else is affected with our hidden, cherished sins.  Yet while they may not be visible to the common eye and we appear all polished and together, sin is never pretty.  Reality check here – sin hinders our effectiveness to bear abundant fruit, it hinders our prayers and sets us up for regret filled consequences if left unchecked.

Bottom line – confession wins every time.  Examining our heart positions us for clean living.  Choosing to seek God’s view welcomes the loving discipline of our Father (Proverbs 28:13).  He who sees our blindspots would never dismiss what needs to be refined in us. And the best part, God welcomes us with open arms (I John 1:9).

Totally convinced I would still be looking for answers and pointing blame at someone else if I hadn’t uttered those words, “Show me Lord if I’m the one who needs to change.”  Certain I would still be consumed with an outcome rather than dealing with the face in the mirror.

Thankful, grateful and blessed for the sweet mercy and overflowing grace of my God who lifts me back up and washes me clean.  A win – win wouldn’t you agree?

“Father, Your lovingkindness draws us to look deep within and confess what hinders.  Praising You for gently showing me what needed to be changed.”

For His Glory

Janet Martin
TRBC Women’s Life